You might be thinking, “Yeah, like, be open. I am open. I’m open-minded. I’m here. I’m open to the spiritual realm. I’m open to different things.”

Well, here’s the truth of the matter:

Sometimes, we get fixed.

Our ego, that part of us that organizes the world around us, our mind, can get fixed in what we believe, how we see ourselves, and how we see the world.

And one of the biggest consequences is that when we get locked into those beliefs, we disconnect from our intuition. We disconnect from our spirit. We disconnect from our power.

Think about an “If only…” statement:

If only I had this job.
If only I had this relationship.
If only I had this experience.

When we live in “If only,” we take the power out of what we have right now.

We disconnect from the present moment, where there are so many magical things happening right now.

We get into our heads, constantly trying to figure everything out.

And the secret, sneaky thing is that it keeps pushing the finish line farther and farther down the field.

Because often, when you finally have that experience, relationship, or job, you suddenly find yourself with another “If only…”

And that is the funny way our little ego intellect gets us stuck in the same circles, leaving us feeling stuck.

But we can change the dynamic.

We can change the equation by cultivating openness.

And that’s also where we receive intuitive guidance. That’s where we find solutions. That’s where we connect with our guides.

So I want to share some tools and practices you can use, some buffers, some checks, to notice where you may need to cultivate more openness and how you can start bringing that energy into different aspects of your life.

How Our Minds Get Fixed

Part of our mind, part of our little ego intellect’s evolutionary job, is to save us energy.

It wants to protect us. It wants to keep us from having to figure everything out all the time.

It wants to protect us from lions, tigers, and bears.

So what does it do?

It makes a little map. It creates little storyboards.

And then it becomes extraordinarily fixed.

Really, really fixed.

You can notice where your mind gets fixed by noticing when you assume you know what the outcome will be.

For example, I have a client who was talking about her family. She has a difficult family relationship and pattern.

She wanted to have a conversation with her sister about whether or not she was going to go to a barbecue.

And in her mind, she was already all over it.

“She’s going to react this way, and it’s going to be like this, and I have no choice.”

And you could just energetically feel all the power drain out of her.

She said, “I always feel this way. I’m always in these relationships where I have to give, over-give, and not receive. And I’m exhausted by it.”

But right there, pause.

Notice how there are some really big keywords we can use as we start to train our awareness.

That’s your tuner.

Notice where we can get stuck.

For my beautiful, sweet client:

“I always feel this way.”

“It’s always like this.”

“It never changes.”

“This is how I am.”

“This is how things will be.”

That is our mind getting fixed.

It’s not open to new experiences. It’s not open to something surprising her. It’s not open to even having a shift.

And that fixedness, saves energy.

But it can also end up shaping how we see ourselves, how we see the world, and keeping us stuck in these different patterns and ruts.

Is That True?

So, a really simple tool is awareness.

That’s your intuitive tuner. That’s your superpower.

Be present first.

How does my body feel?

We’re just using this little dial:

How does my body feel?

When we are in ego-intellect fixedness, my mind is telling me this, we are in a story.

We are not connected to how it feels in our body. We’re not connected to our spirit.

We are saving ourselves energy.

And we can look at it compassionately.

“I know X, therefore whatever X happens, Y will always happen.”

Good information.

But now, take a breath.

If you follow me and watch my videos, you know my favorite tool:

Rub your hands together, pull them apart, and feel the dance of energy between your hands.

Go for it.

One hand on your heart, one hand on your belly.

Deep breath.

Close your eyes.

Bring your attention inward, to your heart space, to your breathing, to your spirit.

You may notice the chatter starting to quiet.

This is an instant way to start opening ourselves up to the energetic awareness of feeling these different signatures.

So right now, okay, we’re anchoring into ourselves and using our intuition.

A simple question to ask your intuition out loud is:

Is that true?

For my client:

Is it true that it’s always going to be this way?

Is it true that my sister is absolutely going to respond like this?

And then wait for an answer to bubble up from your body.

Now, here’s the thing.

Our little ego intellect gets very, very caught up. It really wants to prove its point.

So what it will often do, and this is again where we’re training our awareness, is go back into the story.

“Oh, well, it always happens like this, and da-da-da, and she does this and that…”

If there’s a lot of talking, that is your mind.

That is not your spirit.

That’s not your intuition.

That is a replay of the story over and over again.

And usually, it’s a justification. It’s an explanation.

It’s a “This is what I want this to mean.”

Pause.

Practice centering into compassion for our human parts and thank them.

I genuinely do this all the time in my own practices, with my own ego and all.

Anchoring into compassion, you can say:

“Thank you so much for trying to help me. But I’m going to ask you to please step back. I’m just curious what my spirit has to say.”

And in your mind’s eye, give yourself psychic space to listen.

Often, when we acknowledge our little ego, because it’s coming in with a story, with the thing it’s trying to help with, instead of saying, “Stop!” we acknowledge it by saying, “Thank you.”

And notice how the energy shifts.

Then ask the question again:

Is that true?

And have an answer bubble up from your body.

If it’s complicated, if it talks a lot, if you don’t feel it or sense it, keep practicing.

Is that true?

More often than not?

No.

It’s not.

The Third Space of “I Don’t Know”

The moment we have that, “Oh, my story is not true,” we can ask our intuition to help and support us.

Let me be curious.

And step into the third space of:

I don’t know.

I don’t know.

I don’t know what’s going to happen.

I don’t know how she’s going to react.

And I’m curious.

This is where we can connect with our spirit.

I expect good things.

I trust that this will resolve itself in my highest good.

And I trust that I have help and support.

This is a powerful way of helping to train our ego intellect to be open.

Say:

“I actually don’t know, but I have help and support. I have options. I have guidance. I have ways that I know and can trust the unknown.”

We often don’t like to step into openness because it’s scary.

We don’t know what’s going to happen.

For our human parts, they’re like:

“Wait a minute. Holy guacamole. That seems a lot scarier and more intense because I am out of control.”

Ego does not like not being in control.

But instead of “I don’t know” meaning something scary, “I don’t know” can mean something new, beautiful, and magical can come in.

Trust and say:

“I know it will be resolved.”

This helps to comfort us.

Compassion. Kindness.

It gives us more space.

And that actually brings us to the present.

Coming Back to the Present

When we’re present, the beautiful thing that happens is that this is where we listen to our intuition.

This is where we connect to others.

This is where we reconnect with the spirit of others.

This is where we open up to solutions.

This is where we are guided.

So, just gently taking ourselves and bringing ourselves back to the present, to that place where we can connect, gets us out of our fixed storylines.

It brings us to that support and opens our hearts up to the joy and openness that exists right now, no matter what’s happening.

And when we are open, open really means unrestricted.

I’m unrestricted.
I have freedom.

But when we’re closed, we’ve just said:

I know.

I know the story.

I know the loop.

Nothing else is going to happen.

“I’m always the one that’s stuck.”

“I’ve always been overthinking.”

“I’m always overwhelmed.”

“I’m always…”

Let’s pause and say:

Maybe not.

Is that true?

No.

Who would I want to be?

What do I expect?

What do I want instead?

I’m going to be there directing our energy.

Catching Yourself in the Act

So this week, I really want you to practice being open.

Notice if you’re in the ego intellect.

And it’s really insidious.

It can be really, really sneaky.

You’re like:

“I’m open. I know I’m open.”

And then all of a sudden, you find yourself in something a little uncomfortable, and it’s like:

“No.”

Even for myself right now, I’ve been learning how to DJ.

And it’s been a really fun practice.

I have a friend who invited me to play some music, and it’s going to just be me and some friends. It’s going to be very low-key. The stakes are very low.

But my little ego has a big story.

“It’s going to be bad.”

“It’s going to be a mess.”

“It’s going to be this.”

“It’s going to be that.”

“I don’t want anybody to see me.”

And I noticed that even in starting this process of just sharing something that I love, my ego intellect was not open to having the experience be a journey that could be joyful.

My mind was fixed on how it would probably be.

Would it be good?

You know, my mind is fixed on:

“Probably shouldn’t do that because X, Y, or Z.”

So instead, I’m like:

“You know what? I am going to practice being open.”

Connect with my spirit.

Be curious about what will happen.

And show up from that place.

And anytime I feel my mind, because often, it’s anxiety that will trigger me, I’m like:

“Oh, you’re going to be…”

That’s when the story starts.

That’s when we get to fill in the blank.

Pause.

I don’t know how it’s going to be.

And I’m curious.

I wonder.

I’m excited.

I bet it’s going to be great.

I trust my guides, my angels, to help me have a fantastic experience no matter what.

I’m going to learn.

I’m going to be flexible.

Letting “I Don’t Know” Be a Good Thing

Be open-minded.

Notice when we’re in that receptive mind, how your intuition, your sense of self, your story, and your relationships can completely change.

Because you don’t know.

And that can be a good thing.

There is so much that can happen when we stop deciding in advance what something has to mean.

When we stop pushing the finish line farther and farther away.

When we stop saying:

“If only I had this.”

“If only this person would do that.”

“If only this relationship were different.”

“If only I had that experience.”

And instead we say:

I don’t know.
I’m open.
I’m curious.
I’m here.

That is where something new can actually meet us.

That is where we can reconnect with ourselves.

That is where we can listen.

That is where we can be present.

And that is where life can become a lot more fun.

I hope you enjoyed this read, and let me know:

What are you cultivating for your open mind? What’s the storyline that you’re ready to change?

Leave it in the comments.

If you haven’t yet, take my spirit type quiz just for fun and be open to the result.

If you want to work with me, I offer intuitive readings and mentoring to support you.

I’m sending you my love, and I’ll see you next week.

Sonia